Rock Climbing

For my entire life I've lived within 20 minutes of canyons where the best rock climbing in the world is found. Say what you will about wasted opportunities, but today was my first time ever going.

Yeah, I scaled cliffs. Pretty dangerous. I felt a little bit like Chris O'Donnell in Vertical Limit.

Four of us from the ol singles ward jumped in my friend's truck and went up Big Cottonwood Canyon to some trail my Friend found in this sketchy book from the library. Friend and one of the girls put harnesses on, said some weird climbing words, and Friend climbed up to fasten the rope to the chains at the top of the wall.

When he came down, Belay Girl took the rope and had her turn, cleaning all the carabiners off the bolts as she went.

The other girl went third as I crammed my toes into the climbing shoes Friend obtained for the occasion.

"How hard is this one supposed to be?" I asked.

I was told not to worry about it. How comforting.

"Just put your hands where the chalk residue is," Rapel Girl said after she landed from her descent. "That's what I did because I've never climbed outdoors before."

I'm not sure I went exactly where I was supposed to, but I eventually got to the top and enjoyed a nice rapel back down.

The next one was harder.

I looked up couldn't see any obvious holes. There were a few cracks that looked unsuitable for anything larger than a blade of grass, and just before the top there was a ridiculous overhang that couldn't possibly be part of the climb, right?

I started my ascent and told the girls one of them could have my guitar if I died. It wasn't actually too bad until the overhang. I tried going around, diagonally, and a variety of other ways to get past the lip, all to no avail. The only option was to reach over for a jagged handhold and pull myself up while my legs flailed below.

I failed. My forearms burned, and I could barely lock my fingers onto the jutting rocks, much less pull myself over them.

We ended on an easy one with lots of holes. It proved only a little more difficult than climbing a ladder in some places, which was nice for my ego after failing to pull a Spiderman on wall number two.

Overall, the trip was a success. Even though I can't play guitar because my forearms are dead....